All The Parts

There are so many parts of us that should be seen to and kept
From the top of our heads to the tips of our toes with each aching breathe
The broad side of us against the narrow core of us
The breadth of us to the very shallow of us

All another piece that comes together to make the whole
From the memories we keep now and lose as we grow old

To the muscle that powers our moves
To the tissue that DNA provides and proves

So I must choose a keeper for my many parts
Is it possible to find just one to update so many charts

So one I choose to care for my body
With you thirst will be seen to whether pure or bawdy

Another I'll entrust with my mind to keep it young and fresh
Each day should be full of knowledge clean with wash and dress

So that leaves my heart for you to insure that it always beat
Fill my life with love that can be felt from head to feet

So that leaves just my soul that I can't seem to fit to a tutor
Perhaps that one is just for me to look after and succor

If there was just one keeper how idea would that be
Just one person to see to all the ends that make up me
It's a dream I can't fulfill, one that has no true match
So I'll try to see to the whole with one by one patch

But the thought always lingers that if there is but only one of me
And with all my parts gathered close to cause me to be
There must exist the other end that looks out with such disheart
Knowing that there must be one who can see to all the parts

You Know Who You Are (1992-1998) #tbt

What I See (Formerly In the Distance) chalk pastels 1993

I think the first time I saw you was in the back of my mind
I think I created an image that I know I’d never find
You lived in my thoughts and constantly dominated my dreams
Held me completely enwrapped by the lights you beam

I think the first time I met you was in a space in my head
You know where everything is smoky and bathed in red
I think there I loved you without hesitation or thought
Somehow knowing that you were what I constantly sought

Then I believe I discovered myself in the world you created
It seems as soon as you came my mind was something you generated
Then I no longer possessed the control that always defined me
And yet at the same time I can’t ever remember feeling so free

I think I first found the meaning of life in your face
You know when I covered your hand with mine I knew my place
I think I saw the foundation of the universe in your eyes
The love and sacrifice of devotion that explains birth and why we die

I’m almost positive that I’ve never in life done anything so beautiful
No matter if you stay or if we part nothing can destroy a joining so wonderful
I think the minute your lips touched mine we silently trades souls
I know I’d wake up at night dead and cold needing you to be whole

Do you know what its like to love in your mind before you love in life
Do you know what it is to live as a woman when you’re already a wife
You know, you’ve always known
You know, yours before I was even grown
From the beginning you were what I wished for on the first star
All you have to do to look at me to see yourself, you know who you are

If (1992-1998) #tbt

Dreams charcoal drawn in 1993

If this were my world, you wouldn’t understand
You wouldn’t know how to reach out and take my hand

If this were my earth to behold, rule and share
You wouldn’t know how to accept that I care

If your life became mine to live the way I see fit
Could you, would you be able to release it
If your heart became mine to choose who to love
Could you, would you, accept who I thought of
If your mind became mine to think your every thought
Could you, would you learn every lesson taught
If your soul became mine to give to who I choose
Could you, would you to me be able to lose

Everything in light and lift
Just behold and wonder if

How to Survive Running Away With the Circus – The Conclusion

By Banner Hemweigh

When I researched fan sites, books, and magazines, I noticed that no one really talked about story and plot lines.  The focus was always on the people themselves. The fan base is curious to know these people, not the basics of the sport.

For a decent amount of the world, somehow these characters have transcended the ideas that have always made professional wrestling a joke among other professional athletes. Were I covering professional wrestling strictly for the athletic appeal it would hold very little paper, and very little ink.  But that is because I’m a sports writer, and the things I would focus on bear no weight in the competition that is actually being waged.

The feats that are conducted are very athletic.  The physical and muscle control of most of these performers is inspiring to behold.  So it isn’t the nature of the physicality of the sport that makes me say this.  It’s the nature of the degrees of success.  They aren’t rated by numerical terms.  Success is gauged by crowd control. We aren’t talking stats and numbers; this is about emotion.  This is not to say that most athletic competitions aren’t emotional.  They are, but you cannot break down the field of professional wrestling to cold hard brass tacks.  The true scope of this is not as cut and dry as a football game where there is an absolute winner, and an absolute loser.  What is being achieved is failure for some, and success for others; which if done well, is success for all. 

The storylines should be critiqued like television sitcoms.  The performance should be rated by those knowledgeable about delivery, timing, and the physical challenges of a ring performance.  The quality of show production should be gauged by members of like entertainment vehicles, and rated as such.

Should professional wrestling be covered like a sport?  No. However it should be covered as an alternative form of live theatrical entertainment that just happens to be a sport.  Which is exactly what it is.

I found myself comparing what I saw with the circus.  A very suitable analogy when you consider all of the parts that constitutes a circus; part drama, part skill, and always loads of artistry.  The biggest difference is public perception.  After all, no one questions whether or not the tight rope walker is actually on a tight rope.  No one asks if the trapeze artist is truly using a trapeze.  Wouldn’t it be nice if no one questioned whether or not that man just jumped off of a ladder?

Professional wrestling is a part of American culture, just like football.  The swarms of fans, the dedicated workers, and the billion dollar revenues don’t lie.  And while I am not qualified to cover it, there are people out there who are.  What I would like to see is someone covering it properly to garner the respect it deserves.  Because, in the words of my favorite professional wrestler 3D, “whether you like it or not, it’s the best thing going.”

From Make Mine a Heel by Suenammi Richards

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

Smashwords

"I liked this story. I'm not a big romance fan, but first this writer knows her stuff about football, Texas culture, and pro-wrestling. Second, the romance sucked me in. I wanted these two to get together because I genuinely liked them. This story is a Powerslam for any romance/sports fan!"

@alchemyofscrawl - Coral Russell

"I have to say I am a professional wrestling fan so this book really caught my interest as soon as I read the description. I very much enjoyed this book and definitely most likely will be reading it again at a late date."

-Geeky Girl Reviews

"This isn't a garden variety romance novel featuring sports or wrestling. Ms. Richards has provided the reader with plenty of colorful characters that are dealing with sad, if not tragic, circumstances (racism, child abandonment, ethnic prejudice, drug abuse, etc.). I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed this book."

-The Book Diva

How to Survive Running Away With the Circus – The Performer

By Banner Hemweigh

Keith Daniels is one of the most respected men in his field these days.  He is always greeted when he arrives; his word in the ring rates as law, and no one second-guesses him.  There isn’t a performer that is trusted more whether in the ring, or out of it. He stands a stunning 6 feet 9 inches tall with the athletic versatility of a triathlete in a 280 pound frame.  He has a natural charisma that hums off of him, the diction of a scholar, and if that isn’t enough, he ain’t bad on the eyes.  He’s also the biggest, baddest heel professional wrestling has ever seen.

According to HWE statistics, on average roughly 30% of a live audience will actively jeer a character that is a successful heel, or ‘bad guy’ character.  In industry speak, it’s called heat, and it is the initial response of an audience that knows you’re coming out to see them. For a face, which is the standard ‘good’ guy, it’s called pop, and the pop ratio is relatively higher, roughly pushing towards the 60% mark. It is very hard to generate enough emotional distain to convince a crowd to waste the energy to boo you when it could be used cheering on their face.  These are factors that alter nightly, by locale.

On any given night, in any arena, anywhere in the world, Keith Daniels as 3D will generate heat that is closer to 50%. This average is said to only increase after he has been talking for 30 seconds or more, a ratio that insiders call ‘outrageous’.  Like all things there are exceptions, but with the truth of professional wrestling being broadcast, it’s harder to generate actual distain.  Everyone knows you’re acting.  So how does he do it?

Teddy Rogers recalls meeting a ‘skinny, scrawny 15 year old’ wanting to be trained to wrestle.  Now he refers to this same man as a gift to the industry. Teddy has an idea of what makes Keith Daniels the man that he is.

“Something in that boy that you don’t find everyday.  Is it will, spirit, drive.  Boy has more charisma in his pinky finger than most guys have in their entire bodies; more athletic ability than an Olympian, and I still can’t find anything to compare with the amount of heart he has.”

When asked when he knew he was ready for the ring, the champ is humble.

“Some days it’s when I got through my first televised match without a missed cue. Other days it’s when I finally convinced Teddy to start training me.  But most days, I’m still waiting.  It’s hard to determine ready for a field that is constantly in flux.” 

The man known as the selfish mouthy 3D comes off as unassuming.  The intelligence of the man is evident in his speech.  His respect for his peers and contemporaries pours out of him at every opportunity.  And his love for the fans is inspiring.

After the pay per view in his hometown of Dallas, TX, I conducted a final interview with Keith Daniels, and asked him to sum up what this profession has done for him.

“It’s provided more than just a paycheck.  It’s given me focus when I don’t have it.  Clarity when I can’t think clearly.  It’s shown me the levels of myself that I didn’t know I had.  I wasn’t always a good person, but I am a better one today, and I know it has a lot to do with what I choose to do for a living, and more importantly, how I choose to do it.”

From Make Mine a Heel by Suenammi Richards

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

Smashwords

"I liked this story. I'm not a big romance fan, but first this writer knows her stuff about football, Texas culture, and pro-wrestling. Second, the romance sucked me in. I wanted these two to get together because I genuinely liked them. This story is a Powerslam for any romance/sports fan!"

@alchemyofscrawl - Coral Russell

"I have to say I am a professional wrestling fan so this book really caught my interest as soon as I read the description. I very much enjoyed this book and definitely most likely will be reading it again at a late date."

-Geeky Girl Reviews

"This isn't a garden variety romance novel featuring sports or wrestling. Ms. Richards has provided the reader with plenty of colorful characters that are dealing with sad, if not tragic, circumstances (racism, child abandonment, ethnic prejudice, drug abuse, etc.). I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed this book."

-The Book Diva

How to Survive Running Away With the Circus – The Payoff

So why do this for a living?  A profession that endears criticism, seems to have lackluster benefits, and a more than challenging pace?  For love of performing was the number one answer. And the ability to make your own way best stated by Teddy Rogers.

“Does this sport show a boy what he’s made of?  Yes.  Does it grind up boys that aren’t made of enough up?  Yes.  Does it reward those who are tough enough?  Every time.  Not many things in this life have that kind of return anymore.”

The opinion is that for those that see it out, there is no other way to live.  What I found was a culture of respect, trust, and value that is sometimes lost in other professions, but is a necessary element in this one. Over and over again I was told stories about the tragedies of life, and what hole was filled by this business from individuals who may have found themselves in much more tragic circumstances had this not been an open option for them.

Sheryl Cassidy shares a very similar view of the profession with ring legend Teddy Rogers, and views the business as having an open door policy.

“This place is for freaks and outcasts, the common man, and the uncommon one.  The parts of society that the upper crust likes to pretend don’t exist.  Here the American dream still lives.  Anybody, from any walk of life, any background, any ethnicity, any creed can come, and if they are willing to work hard they can achieve whatever they want.  The world is open here, and we turn no one away unless they prove they are unwilling to work hard”

From Make Mine a Heel by Suenammi Richards

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

Smashwords

"I liked this story. I'm not a big romance fan, but first this writer knows her stuff about football, Texas culture, and pro-wrestling. Second, the romance sucked me in. I wanted these two to get together because I genuinely liked them. This story is a Powerslam for any romance/sports fan!"

@alchemyofscrawl - Coral Russell

"I have to say I am a professional wrestling fan so this book really caught my interest as soon as I read the description. I very much enjoyed this book and definitely most likely will be reading it again at a late date."

-Geeky Girl Reviews

"This isn't a garden variety romance novel featuring sports or wrestling. Ms. Richards has provided the reader with plenty of colorful characters that are dealing with sad, if not tragic, circumstances (racism, child abandonment, ethnic prejudice, drug abuse, etc.). I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed this book."

-The Book Diva

How to Survive Running Away With the Circus – The Price

By Banner Hemweigh

Employees to the HWE are contracted much like any other sport.  These contracts are negotiated prior to performing, and are quite binding. Almost all contracts given by the HWE leave most of the expense of the profession with the athlete.  All travel is arranged, and paid for by the performer.  Only a select few get the company treatment where all is arranged for them.  The performers are considered freelance agents.  Without being recognized by artist guilds or athletic unions, this business is left in the hands of the provider of work, and is without specific regulations.

According to HWE Head Project Manager and On Site Liaison Sheryl Cassidy the level of commitment needed to successfully perform the job and compensation are not equitable to the performer.

“Roughly you make maybe $500,000 a year, mid-carder money.  The bigger stars can go past the million dollar mark if they play their cards right.  So you pay for all travel, hotel, transportation, and just what’s needed for a life on the road.   You take pay cuts if you get injured, pay cuts if you don’t get booked for a pay per view, pay cuts if your merchandise doesn’t sell.  Also the HWE offers no benefits. No retirement, healthcare, or even the basic standards for working in other industries such as disability, accidental death and dismemberment options.  Which in this business, should be a part of the contract.  These are things you have to acquire on your own.  When you factor in hours actually worked, hours spent going to work, and all else in between with fan events and charities it’s considerably more than a standard full time job that only requires a 40-hour workweek. I hate to say it but my family runs what is actually a modern day high paying sweatshop.  Employees spend most of their money and time paying to work.”

The ideas expressed by Sheryl Cassidy come in light of her own personal crisis as she finds herself the daughter of the company, but the girlfriend of a performer.  This insight has crossed the barriers that had normally been in place for decades, and it’s forced the second daughter of HWE owner Thomas Cassidy to take another look at what her family has helped cultivate.

There can be a case made that most entertainment careers carry the same type of policies.  Actors on stage and screen, professional musicians, professional dancers lead very similar lives.  But according to Sheryl Cassidy, with the amount of money being generated the compensation should either be more or benefits should be given for all, and not just case by case.

“Professional dance is a great example.  The larger more successful companies give contracts that take care of everything from living arrangements to paid leave.  Because their bodies are their livelihood they have to treat it that way.  When a dancer gets injured they don’t lose money because they were contracted for a specific period of time, not for how many shows they do, or don’t do.  As the top draws they’ve earned the respect of their peers, and expect the company to take care of them.  Unions have been created to see to the special needs of professional artists and athletes.  It’s long past due for professional wrestling.”

Unlike other contracted sports and performing arts companies, professional wrestling is not seasonal.  Within the HWE organization, usually the only time that a performer receives a break is through an injury. No HWE performer gets paid while injured even though most injuries are received on the job.  With contracts that average 3 or more years of a nearly none stop work load it cannot be compared with even Hollywood movie contracts that pay millions for under a year’s worth of work.  

From Make Mine a Heel by Suenammi Richards

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

Smashwords

"I liked this story. I'm not a big romance fan, but first this writer knows her stuff about football, Texas culture, and pro-wrestling. Second, the romance sucked me in. I wanted these two to get together because I genuinely liked them. This story is a Powerslam for any romance/sports fan!"

@alchemyofscrawl - Coral Russell

"I have to say I am a professional wrestling fan so this book really caught my interest as soon as I read the description. I very much enjoyed this book and definitely most likely will be reading it again at a late date."

-Geeky Girl Reviews

"This isn't a garden variety romance novel featuring sports or wrestling. Ms. Richards has provided the reader with plenty of colorful characters that are dealing with sad, if not tragic, circumstances (racism, child abandonment, ethnic prejudice, drug abuse, etc.). I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed this book."

-The Book Diva

How to Survive Running Away With the Circus – The Job

By Banner Hemweigh

In laymen’s terms, the job is hard.  Annually the HWE produces 12 three hour-long high impact Pay Per Views.  Once a week they stage a mid to high impact two hour long televised showing.  When there is not a pay per view within the week they host at least 3, but never more than 6, two to three hour long low to mid impact non televised ‘House shows’ for limited live audiences.  Since the HWE is international, the schedule also includes exclusive high volume showings in other countries besides America. The shows have professional guild writers, medical staff on hand, hair and makeup crews, top notch pyrotechnics and prop guys, film editing savants able to do it on the fly with only a few hours lead in, and more runners than you can shake a stick at. It is in essence a traveling stage show. All of these components are necessary to set the stage for the main attraction, the performers.

As I learned quickly, the main focus is entertainment through athleticism.  The impact of the job itself bears heavy weight.  The level of stunt work that is done, while safe in increments, can lead to long-term health complications. Without proper conditioning, training, and a trusted medical professional, some of the more unfortunate performers can sustain lifelong disabilities like any other athletic endeavor.

The best of the best combine a signature style of ring performance with basic improvisational and script based acting. As with all things, some are better at it than others.  According to retired legendary ring technician and current HWE trainer Teddy ’Wildman’ Rogers, professional wrestling is a tribute to what came before.

“You’ll be hard pressed to find any live TV anymore.  Even the news is tapped ahead of time. In the ring is a mix of acting, athleticism, and passion.  For the Ancient Greeks theatre was over the top everything.  Costumes, staging, props, sights, sounds, and antics.”

Were the Ancient Greeks watching they would most likely recognize the flair for the flamboyant that most of the performers embody.  An average match is anywhere from 5 to 20 minutes of almost constant motion. This requires focusing on timing, story, and technique all at once. A few of the performers are able to pull off an ironman match.  An ironman match lasts from anywhere between 30 minutes to an hour.  The conditioning for such a feat is most likely found only in Broadway performers, professional dancers, and opera singers.  Very few sports professions leave men out on the field of play for longer than 30 minutes. The men who can and do are superstars of their field, much like professional wrestling.

Then there are the gimmick matches which have gained popularity over the years.  The HWE has put on matches that have involved everything from axes to zambonis.  These matches are usually referred to by the extra prop that will be used, or simply as a ‘hardcore’ match up.  During these matches stunts are higher impact.  The risk of injury is higher, but so is the entertainment level. Some performers have established themselves by signature performances in one of these memorable standout matches.

No one becomes a top tier performer by having just a great look, being great just in matches, or just on a mic.  The idea is to be good to great at all.  In order to be successful the performer has to be able to do it all, have a viable image, a great persona, and nearly flawless ring technique.  

From Make Mine a Heel by Suenammi Richards

Amazon

Barnes & Noble

Smashwords

"I liked this story. I'm not a big romance fan, but first this writer knows her stuff about football, Texas culture, and pro-wrestling. Second, the romance sucked me in. I wanted these two to get together because I genuinely liked them. This story is a Powerslam for any romance/sports fan!"

@alchemyofscrawl - Coral Russell

"I have to say I am a professional wrestling fan so this book really caught my interest as soon as I read the description. I very much enjoyed this book and definitely most likely will be reading it again at a late date."

-Geeky Girl Reviews

"This isn't a garden variety romance novel featuring sports or wrestling. Ms. Richards has provided the reader with plenty of colorful characters that are dealing with sad, if not tragic, circumstances (racism, child abandonment, ethnic prejudice, drug abuse, etc.). I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed this book."

-The Book Diva

How to Survive Running Away with the Circus – Opening Act

By Banner Hemweigh

Recently my editor called me into his office with a proposal. Go check out professional wrestling, and tell me what you see. I was naturally appalled and offended. I’m a football girl; there was no way I’m going to enjoy what I see. But with an open mind, open attitude, and a gracious tour guide, I was able to navigate the traveling circus that is professional wrestling, and come out with the bare bone facts about this pseudo sport.

Here are the facts. The Hypokritis Wrestling Exposition is the biggest professional wrestling promotion in the world, and boasts a billion dollar budget. Through merchandising, pay per view sales, and live events on an international scale, they have managed to leave behind the bargain basement approach that was once the staple of professional wrestling. This is high velocity, high gloss, high impact entertainment creating a different kind of celebrity as is demonstrated by the many websites, magazines, and diverse fan base it holds.

With that in mind, I begin to feel out the rest. My first issue is the one that everyone tends to focus on. It’s fake. Yes and no. The outcomes are predetermined, but the hazards are quite real. I believe its best explained by the current HWE heavyweight champion, Dominique ‘Dangerous’ Dutton, also known as 3D by wrestling fans. 3D is the stage name of Keith Daniels, a man who has lived his life in this business making the best of what he finds. Upon expressing my views about the validity of the action in the sport he calmly says, “You can’t trick gravity.” Point taken.

With that main deterrent gone, I can now get into the mechanics of this activity, which is in fact a sport. I know; I was surprised to discover this as well. But my able tour guide, Keith Daniels, who is an art enthusiast, ex-stunt driver, and 9 credits shy of a Bachelors of Art in History, was very specific about the definition of the word sport. And it applies to this sport completely.

What I found was a lot of talented individuals with a dedication to one thing and one thing alone, a great show. The basis of the sport is a show; an athletic competition that is meant to appeal on more than one level. Like any show, the truth of the affair is behind the scenes. There are stories of triumph and tragedy, chaos and discord, constant lobbying for space and screen time. Pushing for better stories, better angles, and always, better merchandise. It’s like Hollywood on steroids, in some cases literally, and without the security of a standardized union job.

Over the next 5 days I will be detailing my journey with the biggest traveling circus the world has ever seen. Through the eyes of a vaunted legend, the reigning champ, and the inheriting daughter of an empire, I’ll pull back the curtain, and reveal the magician for all to see.

From Make Mine a Heel by Suenammi Richards
Amazon
Barnes & Noble
Smashwords

"I liked this story. I'm not a big romance fan, but first this writer knows her stuff about football, Texas culture, and pro-wrestling. Second, the romance sucked me in. I wanted these two to get together because I genuinely liked them. This story is a Powerslam for any romance/sports fan!"
@alchemyofscrawl - Coral Russell

"I have to say I am a professional wrestling fan so this book really caught my interest as soon as I read the description. I very much enjoyed this book and definitely most likely will be reading it again at a late date."

-Geeky Girl Reviews

"This isn't a garden variety romance novel featuring sports or wrestling. Ms. Richards has provided the reader with plenty of colorful characters that are dealing with sad, if not tragic, circumstances (racism, child abandonment, ethnic prejudice, drug abuse, etc.). I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed this book."

-The Book Diva

Herself or Myself

I believe I wrote this when I was 18 almost 19 years old.  Young girl dealing with pain and the life she saw and what it meant to have compassion and empathy:

I heard you cryin the other night and didn’t know what to do

I felt every tear every sigh, pouring through me and rip me in two

Once again the world has turned its back on you

Once again I stand paralyzed not knowing what to do

I saw you praying the other night and decided to do the same

I didn’t know what you were asking for so I asked for mercy in your name

Hoping God hasn’t become cruel and uncaring to your pain

Hoping He still feels for you and loves you just the same

I noticed the way you walk around now with your head down

I do it now like I’ve lost something special never to be found

Keeping it up high is too hard when you’re around

Keeping it up when all I want to do is let it hang down

I know he beat you once again the other night

I didn’t see him do it but the bruises tell the story on sight

Loving him isn’t going to make it all right

Loving him won’t make him stop hitting you at night

I swear someone was saying the meanest thing about you the other day

I stopped her immediately, told her there’s no base for what you say

Telling her didn’t do one good thing for you

Telling her wasn’t the main thing you needed me to do

I understand now why you and I get along so well

I never had anyone to come to my world and make it anything but hell

Knowing you let’s me see myself clearly

Knowing you helps me to appreciate the pain I hold so dearly

I believe I know how I can help give you back your world

I have a tale on how I got mine back that would make your toes curl

Walking through hell is the only way to salvation I know

Walking away from him is like leaving the last circle of Dante’s inferno

I promised myself that you’d never be hurt again, or was that for me

I can’t seem to separate between us and decide which of us should be free

Staying together on this is important for us

Staying together is the only way we can do what we must

I decided that it was past time that this whole affair came to an end

I want you tot know that the pain has to stop so your heart can mend

Leaving your pain isn’t the answer to your question

Leaving the source of your pain is the way to your hearts protection

I need you to comprehend that this pain you must keep

I tell you it is the reminder you’ll need so this mistake you won’t repeat

Holding the pain will keep you alive as everything else goes cold

Holding the pain will be the spark to make sure you always keep fire in your soul

I stand here now before you with hope in my eyes and both hands held out

I offer you now the method in which to rid yourself of horror and doubt

Standing before you is the life that doesn’t belong to anyone else

Standing beside you is where together we will journey to find ourself.