“I bet you think you’re too good for me too.”
Charlotte had one of those sexpot voices that was hoarse to the point that
sometimes parts of words would fade out to only slightly be heard. When she got angry or excited it would even
squeak out in some places. And always
depending on her mood, slightly tinged with a Southern accent.
Sandra side-glanced her. “I don’t even know who you
are”.
“Well I know who you are. You’re one of those women that look at me,
and see a fat girl. You see a woman who
isn’t worth your space.” She began to
weep. “A woman whose boyfriend you can take. That worthless piece of donkey
dung, how dare he?”
“I’m sorry you’re having a rough time, but I’m not a
boyfriend stealer. I do something else entirely.”
“What do you mean?” she muttered out between sobs as
she patted dry her running face.
“Can I buy you a shot?” Sandra offered out of the blue.
While they had been having their shots, Sandra in an
effort to console Charlotte, had made her privy to her theory on men and love,
and what she meant to do about it. At
the tender age of sixteen Sandra had already scientifically dissected the
nature of every boy in a one-mile radius.
At 18 she had graduated with the knowledge of the social preoccupations
of men within the country she was in. By
21 she had entire nations of men charted and hypothesized for good
measure. Then her adventures with Athol
had settled it for her. She had to use
this knowledge somehow. They couldn’t be
allowed to get away with it.
“You see Charlotte it’s very simple.” She downed a beer. “Men are predisposed to be cheaters. Men are trained at a very early age to follow
their instincts. Their instincts tell them to be fruitful and multiply with as
many women as it takes to propagate the species. This started thousands of years ago before
technology made it unnecessary to make enough humans that nature wouldn’t just
wipe out the species.” She glanced up at
the bartender, “Two more shots of Patron mon ami. The problem is that the mental instincts and
training has been continually taught because women have been placed somewhere
behind cattle since the beginning of time and only what, 70, 80 years ago we
actually started minding it, and doing something about it. We are combating thousands of years of
preprogramming in a span of time that it takes a life to gestate into
fulfillment. All of us girls were being
told we’re equal, and we deserve the best, and not to be treated beneath
cattle. On the other side of the fence
the boys are being told, ‘Don’t mind her boy, she’ll eventually realize where
she belongs.’ And the training is
continued.”
Charlotte gave Sandra a startled look of
understanding. “They don’t have to be
jerks they’re still being taught that we’re beneath them by their fathers and
grandfathers.” She toasted with Sandra, and they downed their shots of
tequila. “I never looked at it like that
before.”
“Very few of us do, that’s why we’re in this
situation. We’re uninformed. It’s in all walks of our life. The trick is that since they can’t legally
keep us in our place they find other ways to do it. Look at our icons and superstars. Men like Danny Devito are stars while women
like Roseanne Barr are constantly trashed for not looking up to snuff. Our American Hollywood rewards female
actresses for playing whores, adulteresses, and loose women. Think about your last 3 years of female Oscar
winners. Male doctors blow off our symptoms as being ‘silly’ and label us
‘hypochondriacs’. And guys leave decent
caring women like yourself for the sake of barely literate eye candy like that
whatever he left you for. Yet when a woman satisfies herself, and her sexual
needs and desires she’s labeled a whore, and unfit for motherhood and marriage.
The only things we are good for by the by.” She paused looking at their empty
shot glasses. “Bartender, another round.” “Well I’m not gonna take it anymore.
I have decided on a course of action, and it’s called W.A.R.M.”
“Warm?” She held up her shot to meet Sandra’s clank,
and simultaneously down.
“Women Assisting the Reclamation of Man. If we leave it up to them it’s never gonna
happen. We have to take this one into our own hands just like we did with our
equality. Not every good-looking girl is as dumb as a post. Most of us have good heads on our shoulders,
and know how to use them. If things are going to level out then this training
will have to be accomplished by women, and it has to be done in a brutal,
harsh, life-altering way to insure that they don’t revert as soon as the lesson
is done. My idea is to gather a group of us, and we systematically start
retraining men.” She glanced up, “Bartender,” pointing to their empty shot
glasses, “Yo!”
“A group; like AA or something?”
“Yeah something like that I suppose.” Sandra frowned. “I didn’t intend for it to be
that big.”
“Why not?”
Charlotte’s odd blue-green eyes started to glint as her mind raced with
the tequila, and the possibilities. “How
is this supposed to happen if you keep it on a small scale? First thing we should do is get a website.”
“Charlotte, I don’t know—”
“Then we can have meetings, and when we get a
membership too high for local meetings there will be seminars.”
“Charlotte, I don’t think—”
“And there has to be a fan club. You know for women
who support us, but don’t have the balls to get out there and do it.”
“No fan clubs—”
“Whose gonna train all of these women?” She stared at
Sandra. “It’s your ideal, so it should be you.
How does a woman reclaim a man anyway?
In a brutal and harsh fashion that is?”
