Showing posts with label Throwback Thursday. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Throwback Thursday. Show all posts

Thursday, January 23, 2014

Herself or Myself

I believe I wrote this when I was 18 almost 19 years old.  Young girl dealing with pain and the life she saw and what it meant to have compassion and empathy:

I heard you cryin the other night and didn’t know what to do
I felt every tear every sigh, pouring through me and rip me in two
Once again the world has turned its back on you
Once again I stand paralyzed not knowing what to do

I saw you praying the other night and decided to do the same
I didn’t know what you were asking for so I asked for mercy in your name
Hoping God hasn’t become cruel and uncaring to your pain
Hoping He still feels for you and loves you just the same

I noticed the way you walk around now with your head down
I do it now like I’ve lost something special never to be found
Keeping it up high is too hard when you’re around
Keeping it up when all I want to do is let it hang down

I know he beat you once again the other night
I didn’t see him do it but the bruises tell the story on sight
Loving him isn’t going to make it all right
Loving him won’t make him stop hitting you at night

I swear someone was saying the meanest thing about you the other day
I stopped her immediately, told her there’s no base for what you say
Telling her didn’t do one good thing for you
Telling her wasn’t the main thing you needed me to do

I understand now why you and I get along so well
I never had anyone to come to my world and make it anything but hell
Knowing you let’s me see myself clearly
Knowing you helps me to appreciate the pain I hold so dearly

I believe I know how I can help give you back your world
I have a tale on how I got mine back that would make your toes curl
Walking through hell is the only way to salvation I know
Walking away from him is like leaving the last circle of Dante’s inferno

I promised myself that you’d never be hurt again, or was that for me
I can’t seem to separate between us and decide which of us should be free
Staying together on this is important for us
Staying together is the only way we can do what we must

I decided that it was past time that this whole affair came to an end
I want you tot know that the pain has to stop so your heart can mend
Leaving your pain isn’t the answer to your question
Leaving the source of your pain is the way to your hearts protection

I need you to comprehend that this pain you must keep
I tell you it is the reminder you’ll need so this mistake you won’t repeat
Holding the pain will keep you alive as everything else goes cold
Holding the pain will be the spark to make sure you always keep fire in your soul

I stand here now before you with hope in my eyes and both hands held out
I offer you now the method in which to rid yourself of horror and doubt
Standing before you is the life that doesn’t belong to anyone else

Standing beside you is where together we will journey to find ourself.